Choosing Love over Fear

2019-03-05T21:31:29+02:00January 18th, 2019|Sisterhood and Soul Fire|0 Comments

A tale of illusion

We live in a society that has taught us to be fearful.

We weren’t born that way, we were born open, observant, trusting and permeable. Yet slowly but surely, fear began to mold us.

We inherited fears from our parents: “that spider is scary, don’t speak to strangers, don’t swim straight after a meal or you’ll drown, don’t climb that tree you’ll fall and break your arm. “
We inherited fears from society: “don’t eat too much cake or you’ll get fat, look pretty or the boys won’t like you, go to college or you’ll never get a job.”

Now, I’m not completely crazy… I realize that certain fears are crucial to our survival – Stepping into that fire will most probably burn you. Maybe don’t do it.


And how much of this fear means you’re either living in the past, based on something that might have happened to someone else, or worse: living in the idea of a fear-based future that may or may not (it probably won’t) happen?

Your thoughts become your reality

I have touched on this in a few of my other posts, your thoughts are powerful. They create an energy that is woven into everything that you see before you. In some way or other, whether you realize it or not: your current reality is a direct result of the thoughts you have and the energy they vibrate on.

Look around you: what do you see? The home you live in, the job you have, the people you surround yourself with: these are, in some way or other, based on your thoughts and fear-based beliefs. Do you believe that you have the same earning capacity as your parents, and their parents before them? Did you choose your partner because on some level they match the requirements set for you by society? Did you accept a job because it is what you have been taught to believe it is acceptable and expected? For a company society deems “successful”?

Of course you can’t change any of it, because: YOU MUST FEAR THE UNKNOWN.

Don’t go into the woods at night

What if the woods aren’t all that scary? What if, instead of darkness and monsters and fear, they hold a magical world of wonder and unicorns and freedom? What if you find a whole world of others who have been bold enough to cross the threshold? Unless you turn your fear-based reality on it’s head, you’ll never know what’s out there.

If you have a journalling practice I invite you to grab a pen and paper and journal on this. If you don’t have a journalling practice, grab a pan and paper an journal on this anyway  😄

Now, list for me 4-5 things that you were taught to be fearful of (By society, a teacher, a partner, your parents) e.g:

  • Being alone or single
  • Being overweight
  • Speaking to strangers
  • Heights lead to falls
  • Fat makes you fat
  • Speaking up
  • Lack of safety
  • Being a failure, not having enough money
  • Being successful, earning a lot of money and being ‘greedy’
  • Disappointing others
  • Following your passion will make you broke
  • Not saving for retirement or a “rainy day”

Done it? right. Now answer me this:

How have these fears manifested in your life?

… Chills… amiright?

Nothing is real

Your beliefs, your reality, what you see around you… none of it is real. Not unless you give it the power to be so. What happens when you take your power back from fear? What if you prove fear wrong, and redesign the life that you LOVE instead of living in a life of FEAR? What if you threw caution to the wind and spoke to a stranger, booked a plane ticket AND ate the cake??? What if you followed your bliss, let creativity and love flow through you AND made more money doing it?

What if you died tomorrow having lived a life that never reached it’s full potential?
What if you stayed small. And grey. And dissatisfied…
What if playing with fire doesn’t burn you, it just sets your soul on fire…

Maybe, just maybe, this time when you jump you won’t fall, you’ll FLY.

Feel afraid. And do it anyway

Whether we have a fear of failure, or a fear of success: all fear is the same. It acts in the opposite way of love, trust, faith. It acts in an illusionary realm that keeps us small and stagnant.

You have to make a commitment to taking action regardless of the fear you feel. You have to decide on a new way, give yourself permission to step up, claim your greatness and share your message of truth. I’m not saying this path is easy, dear ones. It will be a challenge to break the cycle of your old beliefs. But what I am saying is this: you can choose faith over fear.

How to release your fear

  1. When you are called to do something and feel resistance of any kind. Don’t run from it, acknowledge it. Sit in your fear and come to understand it. Shine a light into the darkness and see it for what it is.
  2. Ask yourself: who’s fear is this? Who gave it to me? How old was I when I first came upon it? Is this fear mine to carry? How has it served me or restricted me?
  3. Is this fear even true? Trust yourself: you are a leader, you are worthy, you are here to serve
  4. Now decide: which is stronger, your fear or your faith? Is your vision, your purpose and your message stronger than all that has held you back?
  5. Release the fear. “Thank you fear, for all you have taught me. I no longer require you, I release you”
  6. Be in action. Relentlessly. The only way to extinguish fear is by acting, proving it wrong and rising above it. Choose action, choose love, and trust that you have everything you need already within you

The universe responds to speed and momentum… when your thoughts, your words and your actions are all singing the same song, things can’t help but change.

When you are no longer controlled by limiting beliefs, when you are free from the confines of scarcity and fear, that is when you are truly living.


Soul Fire


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Pam Newman

I’m Pam Newman, founder of The Branded Panda. I help women like you create soul-based businesses that give them income and freedom to truly LIVE.



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